Funny Parody Songs (YouTube hits)

So today, I thought I would share with you 5 of the silliest YouTube parody songs that have gained epic followings over the years. 

Let’s start with 

5. The Bob and Tom Show – Camel Toe

4. Weird Al Yankovic – White and Nerdy

3. Bart Baker – Dark Horse Parody

2. Tim Hawkins – The Wife Song

1. Weird Al Yankovic – Amish Paradise

What are your favourites?

Tim Vine and his great one-liners.

Tim Vine is an English writer, actor, comedian and presenter, known for his quick-fire puns and his role on the BBC series Not Going Out. He is also rather hilarious. Here are 15 funny one-liners of his that made me chuckle. 

• Exit signs? They’re on the way out!
• Black Beauty? Now there’s a dark horse!
• Velcro? What a rip-off!
• Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
• I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
• I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again
• Conjunctivitis.com – that’s a site for sore eyes
• So I said to a Scottsman ‘did you have terrible spots as a kid?’ He said ‘ac ne’
• The phone was ringing. I picked it up and said: “Who’s speaking please?” And a voice said: “You are.” 
•  The advantage of easy origami is two-fold…
• I went to the doctor. I said to him: “I’m frightened of lapels.” He said: “You’ve got cholera.” 
•  I bought a train ticket and the driver said: “Eurostar.” I said: “Well I’ve been on telly but I’m no Dean Martin.”
• Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said “Parking Fine”. So that was nice.
• I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper… dicing with death!
• Beware of Alphabet Grenades; if you throw them, it could spell disaster

Bras and Boobs (A poem) – not to be taken seriously

They hold within objects so dear

To many a man who likes a woman 

And in a multitude of materials woven

and colours so varied for one to lust. 

As to whether their support is needed

I am not one to offer judgement 

Though when I see one; or just a strap

My mind begins to wander over

Yes, what they hold will sink a man 

and make him surrender all his honour

Those cushion hammocks are to plunder

If only she would take my number.

A cheeky thought had crossed my mind 

That beauty is far more than a teet

But bouncing bossoms will take me under 

Oh what a sight; a glorious treat. 

Don’t Shoot Me Santa Claus

Okay my dear friends!

Christmas time is closing in. And in the spirit of this wonderful time of the year, I wanted to share with you one of my favourite Christmas songs!

I give to you ‘Don’t Shoot Me Santa” by The Killers

 

If you’re interested in the lyrics, they are (with thanks to azlyrics.com)

Oh Santa
I’ve been waiting on you
That’s funny kid
Because I’ve been coming for you

Oh Santa
I’ve been killing just for fun
Well the party’s over kid
Because I
Because I got a bullet in my gun
A bullet in your what?

Santa’s got a bullet in his gun
You know it, Santa’s got a bullet in his gun

Don’t shoot me Santa Claus
I’ve been a clean living boy
I promise you
Did every little thing you asked me to
I can’t believe the things I’m going through

Don’t shoot me Santa Claus
Well no one else around believes me
But the children on the block they tease me
I couldn’t let them off that easy

Oh Santa
It’s been a real hard year
There just ain’t no gettin’ around this
Life is hard
But look at me
I turned out alright

Hey Santa
Why don’t we talk
Believe me
This ain’t what I wanted
I love all you kids, you know that
Hell, I remember when you were just 10 years old
Playing out there in the desert
Just waiting for a sip of that sweet Mojave rain
In the sweet Mojave rain
The boy was on his own

Don’t shoot me Santa Claus
I’ve been a clean living boy
I promise you
Did every little thing you asked me to
I can’t believe the things I’m going through

Don’t Shoot me Santa Claus
Well no one else around believes me
But the children on the block they tease me
I couldn’t let them off that easy

They had it coming
So why can’t you see?
I couldn’t turn my cheek no longer
The sun is going down and Christmas is near
Just look the other way and I’ll disappear forever

Woo!

Don’t shoot me Santa Claus
Well no one else around believes me
But the children on the street they tease me
I couldn’t let them off that easy

Believe me
Santa
Santa

Eddaz (the poem) (as promised)

Eddaz is a hottie

Though strangely I’ve never seen her

She could blue or green or pink 

But what’s that even matter. 

Her posts are sometimes saucy 

Maybe a lil bit naughty 

Sometimes they simply hit the spot 

She simply can’t exhaust me!

I promised her a ditty

But instead I made this rhyme. 

It might be slightly tacky 

But I did it in no time. 

So hopefully she is smiling 

Or maybe even laughing 

Because this was made thinking of her 

And my words I am exhausting. 

Wacky Signs 3: Wacked off

Here are some more of the latest and greatest signs. 

1. That sign bested me!

I don’t know which is worse, the fact that the Guinness costed €6 or that the waitresses were all dressed up! The cheek!

2. Good advice

Every person should heed this warning. If you are going to slip, then remember to fall down carefully. 

3. Above and beyond. 

What makes a good bar a great bar? Well now you know. 

4. That’s what she said. 

Ah muff. One of those words you pick up as a 10 year old never to be innocent again. 

5. George Michael was HERE

Oh wouldn’t it be nice, if I could touch your body..umm..no. But hey, whatever floats your boat!

6. Jiggalos advertise too. 

I’m not even going to ask what cock light is but it’s good that they offer you a drink while you are at it. 

7. Here kitty!

I’ve heard the rumours! Where is he? Where is my Tiddles! 

8. Don’t streak on this golf course!

To be fair, you shouldn’t be swinging that club out and about on a golf course any way! Dirty perverts!

9. The key was in the name. 

Come on, how can you be surprised you got crabs with a name like that!? I hope your doctor helps you out. 

10. Quack quack!

LEAVE DONALD ALONE! There is one thing giving a duck bread but what sort of crazy people like here?????