Funny Parody Songs (YouTube hits)

So today, I thought I would share with you 5 of the silliest YouTube parody songs that have gained epic followings over the years. 

Let’s start with 

5. The Bob and Tom Show – Camel Toe


4. Weird Al Yankovic – White and Nerdy


3. Bart Baker – Dark Horse Parody


2. Tim Hawkins – The Wife Song


1. Weird Al Yankovic – Amish Paradise


What are your favourites?

Tim Vine and his great one-liners. 

Tim Vine is an English writer, actor, comedian and presenter, known for his quick-fire puns and his role on the BBC series Not Going Out. He is also rather hilarious. Here are 15 funny one-liners of his that made me chuckle. 

  • Exit signs? They’re on the way out!
  • Black Beauty? Now there’s a dark horse!
  • Velcro? What a rip-off!
  • Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
  • I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
  • I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again
  • Conjunctivitis.com – that’s a site for sore eyes
  • So I said to a Scottsman ‘did you have terrible spots as a kid?’ He said ‘ac ne’
  • The phone was ringing. I picked it up and said: “Who’s speaking please?” And a voice said: “You are.” 
  •  The advantage of easy origami is two-fold…
  • I went to the doctor. I said to him: “I’m frightened of lapels.” He said: “You’ve got cholera.” 
  •  I bought a train ticket and the driver said: “Eurostar.” I said: “Well I’ve been on telly but I’m no Dean Martin.”
  • Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said “Parking Fine”. So that was nice.
  • I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper… dicing with death!
  • Beware of Alphabet Grenades; if you throw them, it could spell disaster

A poem about bras

I am trying to write a poem about bras but I can’t make it funny enough. It is really bumming me out.

Who would have thought writing a poem about bras could be so hard? Or that it would be so hard to get something to rhyme with “squishable pillows”.

No, my minder is not in the gutter! Do not look at me that way. I am simply an artist and this blog is my canvas.

I’ll get there…eventually…right?!

Wacky Signs 2: Return of the Wack

Hey guys and girls,

I thought I’d give you another round of humorous signs since I know you lot enjoyed them and I enjoyed finding them too. So here is a new top 10. Starting at 1…

1. Crazy after club activities in China


Lets all go down to the impregnation room and get our jiggies on, man! Protection NOT optional. 

2. This masseuse does it all. 


Yeah, I hear this place is very hands on if you know what I mean. Good thing they have obscured glass windows. 

3. Nigel Farrage’s home town. 

It isn’t actually Nigel’s home town but you know, it’s the sort of mad British town name that makes you want to cover your face. 

4. Trump Hotels

Haha I couldn’t resist. We all know that no one has more respect for women than he does, honest. He wouldn’t even call Megyn Kelly a bimbo because it wasn’t “politically correct”. 

Note the following:



Yes, I know, I have a massive crush on Megyn Kelly blah blah blah but it still doesn’t change that Trump is a jerk and a mysogonist 

5. Let’s Dance


Lol! Someone must have had good fun making this sign! Who wants to swing their hips with me? (DANCING YOU PERVERTS!)

6. The Giving Man

That explains why women like men with loose tongues. Usually, that’s helped with a few alcoholic beverages. 

7. The Klan is now building parks?


I guess it can’t be much fun though with all the burning crosses and such. 

8. I love breakfast food. 


I wonder if they have cream or maple syrup. Both could be fun but I’d be worried you are more likely to attract bugs with the syrup. 

9. My lawn is making me paranoid. 


It’s smiling? Next it will be talking. I think someone needs therapy. 

10. Damn it!

And I thought any item that requires careful fitting is try before you buy?

Severance (2006) [Movie Review]


Background:

Severance is a 2006 British-German comedy horror film co-written and directed by Christopher Smith. Co-written with James Moran, it stars Danny Dyer and Laura Harris. The film tells a story of group of co-workers who go to a remote mountain forest in Hungary, where they become victims of murderous attacks.

Plot:

The European Sales division of Palisade Defence military arms corporation are on a bus to a team-building weekend at a “luxury lodge” in the Mátra Mountains of Hungary. When a fallen tree blocking the road halts the bus’s progress, the driver refuses to take a dirt road through the woods and, after an argument, drives off leaving the group to walk the remaining distance to the lodge.


Eventually the group reaches the lodge, which is old and in serious disrepair, but the manager Richard convinces the wary but tired group to enter. Inside, Harris discovers a file cabinet full of cryptic Palisade documents, written in Russian. 

The first tell tale sign that all isn’t right is when one of the employees serves the group a meat pie that he found in the kitchen while they discuss these cryptic documents, only for one of them to find a human tooth in their slice. Later, when they head off to bed, one of the group, Jill, spots someone staring into the lodge. The group go outside to look for the voyeur but nobody is found and the group agree to leave the lodge the next day barring Richard. However, the next day when some of the team make their way to find the bus driver to take them home…things take a grizzly turn for the worst. 


Opinion:

The film currently holds an approval rating of 65% on the film critic site Rotten Tomatoes and was lauded by Rolling Stone magazine for its “mischievous blending [of] The Office with Friday the 13th”. 

As for my opinion, well, the film works well in a number of ways. The director, who is previously know for the Brit Horror Creep moved from the black horror of his previous title to something a little more humorous and it paid off, even if you aren’t a great Danny Dyer fan (which I’m not). Yes, at the heart of it, it is a slasher but it is also reasonably intelligent with a good fast paced dialogue and some genuinely funny moments. 


For those who are squeamish, then it may not be the film. The death scenes are quite gruesome so it isn’t for the faint hearted in that regard. And while it isn’t quite Shaun of the Dead funny, Severance is another example of horror movies mixing gruesomeness with some more light hearted moments that makes the film little more than a cold slaughterfest that you come to expect with most modern day films. 

Overall Rating = B-

See the full trailer here:

A Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocolypse: Review


So recently, I finally got down to watching a film that I had long wanted to see, Scouts Guide To the Zombie Apocolypse. And while I won’t lie and say that the cute blonde on the front cover didn’t play any part in my intrigue of this film, I am self confessed Zombie Apocolypse nerd and a big fan of shows like The Walking Dead and movies like Dawn of the Dead, Resident Evil, Shaun of the Dead and World War Z. So I was pretty excited even if I was unsure what to expect. 

The plot:

Three boyhood friends who are scout members get stuck in the middle of a zombie Apocolypse. Pretty simple right?  The three boys, Ben, Carter and Augie have been Scouts pretty much throughout their childhood. And while Augie is a die hard scout aficionado, Carter wants out while Ben is somewhere in between; especially Ben wouldn’t mind out but he doesn’t want to hurt Augie’s feelings.  This comes to a head when a big party from some older kids is happening on the same night that Augie is about to get an important badge and Ben is torn between hanging out with some cute girls and sticking by his friend. Then a zombie Apocolypse happens. All they have is each other to battle the storm until they meet a gorgeous bartender called Denise and comedy ensues as the four of them battle the undead. 

Thoughts:

The film, while pretty basic is pretty entertaining. The cast is pretty on point and there are quite a few laughs out there throughout the running time. And while this film might not be as laugh out loud funny as say Shaun of the Dead, the events of the night are quite comical, added to by some great cameos from David Koechner and Cloris Leachman. 


This movie gives you plenty including some rather cringeworthy moments, numerous zombie selfies as well as zombie cats. Yes, you heard me. ZOMBIE CATS. 

Scouts Guide To A Zombie Apocolypse is a fun film that will keep you amused throughout its running time and will give you some memorable moments to joke with friends about. I’m giving this one a B-.

Jonah Hill mocked on French TV


Jonah Hill recently appeared on French television program Le Grand Journal with the intention of promoting his latest movie War Dogs but things didn’t go quite according to plan…

Hill was being interviewed by the show’s host, French beauty Ornella Fleury when things began to take a turn for the worse. Fleury joked “It’s when I saw you get sodomized by a three-meter-tall demon in This Is the End that I told myself, ‘Now that’s the man of my dreams!'” And Hill didn’t find it one bit funny. Indeed, amidst the laughter, you can hear Hill retort “”I hear you get sodomized pretty often!”

Things only got worse from there as Fleury, undeterred by Hill’s response, proceeded to share with the audience her sexual fantasy involving Hill. Awesome right? Not for Hill. Fleury elaborated “My sexual fantasy would be that we’d meet up in a hotel room at night. We would chat, you’d make me laugh. You would make me laugh a lot! And then all of a sudden, you’d bring your friends DiCaprio and Brad Pitt — And then you’d go away!” Jonah Hill, visibly annoyed at this stage simply responded  “I’m glad I came to this show to get ridiculed by a local weather girl. It’s nice”. 

It has since been reported that Jonah Hill consequently cancelled all further interviews scheduled to promote his movie. Yikes!

For the FULL video of the exchange, watch the video below…