Awkward. Most actors don’t have this short a sex scene. 

I had decided at the start that I was going to reduce the level of smut in my blog because I was a bit concerned with some of the attention I was getting. There are definitely times when I find rude stuff funny but I still don’t want to end up making friends with some insane nymphomaniac. No offense nymphos – I’m sure there are people out there that love you. 

That being said, today, I started watching The Night Manager which stars Hollywood and British heartthrob Tom Hiddleston and House himself Hugh Laurie. And I went into it with an open mind even though I didn’t really know what to expect besides hearing that “Hiddleston was so good that should be the next Bond”. But yeah, I know all the fan girls out there literally want him in anything so I didn’t take that much notice. 

Anyway, watching part of it, my thoughts are that the show started off slow but did pick up somewhat over time. However, what stood out for me the most was that Hiddleston had quite a few sex scenes – much more than I am used to seeing anyway. And I get why girls like him. He’s well groomed, tall, and has the type of accent that makes all the cats crave but that still doesn’t make seeing him in sex scenes seem normal. And while I should stress I haven’t seen it all yet, there was one seen that struck me as being the quite..short.  See below. 

In addition to making an ass of himself, I was surprised to see Hiddleston “finish up” in such a quick time. And sure, while many would argue that this gives a sense of realism, others might laugh at the time it took (less than a minute). Personally, I didn’t see the point of this scene and I don’t really see it as sexy or with point. I guess all it really did was get young women to tune in to see their favourite British eye candy’s butt. 

That’s all from me. 

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Thanks for the Orgy Shirt

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 You know what Mums are like; they live th spoil their kids. And when they have a girl, Mum’s enjoy that special gift of being able to indulge in buying clothes.  This continues no matter how old their child is. 

One mum decided to buy a nice t-shirt for her 18-year-old daughter, Katie.

It was even a designer one  too – Vivienne Westwood in fact – I know right, so fancy but pretty trendy at the same time – with a lovely gold pattern (I am definitely heterosexual! Honest!) 
But what Mum hadn’t noticed was that the pattern was actually depicting a huge orgy. 


Yep, it’s A LOT of people bumping uglies in the name of fashion. 

As you can see from the tweet above, it actually caused a bit of a stir online being retweeted over 3000 times and liked nearly 6000 times. 

One thing that caught people’s attention (if you look carefully at the top picture) is that one of the depictions is in fact a dog. What a dog is doing there is anyone’s guess. But I think that Vivienne Westwood’s design here is rather questionable. 

Apparently her Mum has found it hilarious. 


For those interested in this bizarre shirt, apparently it is actually made for men and has a retail value of just less than £50. So, if you so desire, go buy yourself a kinky shirt. 

Thigh gaps and bikini bridges

I have heard some crazy things in my time but the latest one to catch my attention is this craze about women having thigh gaps and what can only be referred to as a “bikini bridge”. And honestly, I’m quite bemused, appalled and flabbergasted all at the same time.

Here is why…

I first came across the theory of the bikini bridge and indeed the “attractiveness” of the thigh gap on a TV show called Naked Attraction on the UK TV channel, Channel 4. The show, presented by Anna Richardson, has a clothed man or woman select two contestants from six naked men or women whose bodies and then faces are revealed in stages from the feet up. He or she then takes of their clothes to select one of the two finalists to go on a clothed date. Now, I don’t get shocked too easily but this show blew me away. Never before had I ever seen something so superficial. I mean, literally a woman would eliminate a man from the competition for his penis being too small or a woman being eliminated by a man for her lady bits sticking out too much. There is no way you can watch this show without feeling a million times more self conscious about yourself. And hey, I already hate my body! But anyway, so there was this one guy in the episode I did watch who was looking at his selection of girls and giving some rather intriguing reasons why he wanted to eliminate each girl. And while I won’t bore you with every answer, one took me by surprise.  He eliminated one girl because she didn’t have a gap between her thighs.


Now apparently this is a thing even though I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing. The guy on the show said that women with gaps in between their thighs are more flexible and better in bed. Further research into this craze led me to Wikipedia which stated that “The idea of the thigh gap received widespread news coverage in December 2012 after the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show which featured several models with thin thighs. Images of thigh gaps featured in “thinspiration” blogs and across social networking sites. The Twitter account Cara’s Thigh Gap was started which used images of Cara Delevingne as an example of thigh gaps.”

Really?


I mean, okay, I have heard women talk about their thunder thighs before – something I have never truly understood – but this all seems a bit mad.

My research however led me further into the dark abyss of body shaming.

Bring on the bikini bridge. No, I can’t believe this is actually a thing but it is. This term apparently originates from as recent as 2009 and is defined as when bikini bottoms are suspended between hip bones, causing a space between the bikini and the lower abdomen. It started off as a hoax that got all too real when fake endorsements from celebrities such as Harry Styles and Justin Bieber made girls want to have this ridiculous look. Newsflash, it has no benefits whatsoever.


Girls, I’m going to let you into a secret. Thick thighs are not a bad thing. And nobody cares about bikini bridges. Trust me, if you are in a bikini, no guy with half a brain is going to be thinking “I wonder if she has a bikini bridge”. Actually thick thighs are REALLY SEXY. Little Mix recently performed “Shout out to my Ex” live on TV and all the girls bared their thighs. Each of them are of different proportions and not one of them looked unattractive. Far from it!


Basically, this comes back to a fundamental point that I have hammered home time and time again on my blog and that is that beauty should not be categorised as some object preset that all girls (and guys) should aspire to. Of course, some people will have preferences and the reasons behind that are intriguing. Indeed, a question whether this is a natural attraction or whether this is brainwashed into us from an early age as to what we should like. Body shape has no indication on what sort of a partner that person will be, how giving and understanding they will be. You could have the most “beautiful” woman in the world but if she is selfish and uncaring, she’s going to be a pretty shoddy partner. Body shape is no indication of how good a protector that person will be. After all, we don’t live in the Stone Age and a man doesn’t require brute strength to be “the man”. Frankly, if you want a meat head, that’s fine but I might be busy when you require something technical doing. Sorry about that. But more importantly, beauty and “perfection” comes in all shapes and sizes. When I think about my ideal partner, I don’t think about thigh gaps, perfectly flat stomachs or bikini bridges. Frankly, if she is in a bikini full stop, I’d be very excited regardless of the dimensions. It wouldn’t be about perfect cup sizes or big butts. But it would be able the moments we share and the intimacy that we have. If I can find a woman that cares about me enough to share her time with me, go through trials and tribulations together and generally be there for one another. To meet someone who I can connect with on every level, then I can guarantee you she will be the sexiest thing in my world. I have no schematic for that. In fact, the gap in between her thighs is the last of my concern. Lol, I realise I’m rambling here somewhat but you get my point, right? At the end of the day, everyone has beauty. The things that make them unattractive are usually not even physical. They are habits, actions and personalities. They are how that person chooses to be. These are the things that matter, at least to me. But maybe that’s why I’m single?  Who knows?

Either way, I will love you and leave you.

My best,

David

P.S. Marilyn Monroe never had a thigh gap and she is considered one of the most beautiful women of all time…

Sex Robots. Wait what? Since when did I enter Westworld?

One of the latest stories of the day is that of Sex robot ‘clones’, made to order, that are identical to your favourite celebrity crush and which will even have their own PULSE. I know…I’m creeped out too. 

Love and Sex with Robots author David Levy has claimed the sex robots “are coming” to a store near you, he tells the Daily Star, which granted is the bastion of knowledge here in the UK. 

They would used photographs to build the human replicas and maybe even have them sound like the person.


Mr Levy is quoted as saying “Once the technology and the whole system of ordering and manufacturing these products becomes sophisticated, you won’t be able to stop your ex-boyfriend if he wants to order a robot that looks like you, same size as you, with the same voice as you”. 

He also BELIEVES that the range could also extend to a celebrity line, with A-listers licensing their images. Sure, I can see that level of depravity happening – well, maybe with Charlie Sheen or Pamela Anderson. 


The reality of this story is somewhat mixed. Writer and Sex Councillor Ian Kerner recently told the Daily Mirror that these robots would enable couples to have fantasy threesomes and also for sex-hungry partners to be able to “act out fantasies” without the cause for concern or jealousy. PERSONALLY, I think I would have a bit of an issue if my girlfriend was going steady with someone else, whether it be another man, woman or advanced vacuum cleaner but that’s just me. Regardless, it is heavily debated how soon these robots will reach the market. While some people have estimated them to be here “soon”, others believe that they are still far away. Nevertheless, one thing for certain is that the sex technology industry is an ever growing and fast moving industry and some have predicted that these machines could be around realistically as near as 2030. 


Personally, it seems all a bit too cringeworthy for me. 

Why oh why did “pussy” become a bad word?

Serious question here. Whatever happened to using words in a nice way? And no I’m not saying that THAT isn’t a nice thing but why do we have to use words that mean other things to describe it. 


When I was just a little kid, if someone said “pussy” to me, it would be said as a referral to pussycat. You know, I was that little boy walking down my street calling for my cats saying “HERE kitty kitty! Here puss puss!”


It’s weird don’t you think? And you know, with me now being older, it’s sad that the innocence is gone. And it’s not that I mind being more aware of sex and sexuality, it’s just that it was nicer when the word pussy just simply meant cat. Because now, whenever I hear someone say “aww look at that pussy”, it becomes all weird and I feel like I should say something because it’s not appropriate. But it’s only inappropriate because we made it inappropriate!!! Well damn it! I’m taking it back! And if I want my pussy, I’m not going to be embarrassed about saying it!


Oh and if you are interested, people on the continent have some other interesting turns of phrase for female genitalia. The Portuguese one sounds particularly fetching (either Portuguese men are pigs or Portuguese women have low self esteem). 

Words referring to cats are used as vulgar slang for female genitals in some other European languages as well. Examples include German Muschi (literally “house cat”), French chatte (“female cat”, also used to refer to sexual intercourse), and Dutch poes (“puss”). The Portuguese term rata (literally “female rat”)and Norwegian mus (“mouse”) are also animal terms used as vulgar slang for women’s genitals.

Police Squad to the rescue – Project Amsterdam

If you are in the police, you cannot take things to chance. After all, ignoring a possible situation can have dramatic consequences. One such team in Amsterdam of the Netherlands weren’t about to take that chance. 


It all started when the officers were responding to a report from neighbours who were concerned by a woman who had been standing still for a prolonged period of time. The woman was said to be in her underwear.

 

The team, who attended the call said they witnessed a woman who was indeed dressed in her underwear from outside, but when they rang the doorbell she would not answer. The officers were understandably concerned and left with no other option, they sprung to action and bust the door down. 


But all wasn’t as it seemed. Indeed, when they broke down the door, they “indeed found a lifeless woman,” but she was “made of plastic and filled with air” as she was a SEX DOLL

The embarrassed police moved the doll away from the window so that there would be no confusion but it was never reported if criminal charges were made. The sex doll was also unavailable to comment although I have it on good authority that she was filled with hot air. 

Source: The Mirror

The dark side of the internet: the rise of sextortion

I don’t know how many of you follow the news but over here in the United Kingdom, we have been witnessing a rise in an online sex blackmailing scam known by the police and media as sextortion
Victims are being lured into exposing themselves or committing sex acts online by pretty young women after accepting their friendship requests on social networking sites.

They then face payment demands of hundreds of pounds – or threats that recordings of their behaviour will be sent to work colleagues, family and friends whose contact details they have unwittingly given access to. The scams, which have been on the rise for the past 18 months, has led to tragedy with as many as four men having recently committed suicide because of the threats. At least two of the suicides were kids of no more than 17 years old. 

Martin Hewitt, of the National Police Chiefs’ Council, said: “We started to see it emerging about 18 months ago.

“Last year we had about 300 offences recorded in the UK and we’re now this year over 900, and I suspect there’s a significant number that don’t get reported because the crime is preying on people’s embarrassment and their humiliation of being caught out doing something like this.”
Schoolboy Ronan Hughes, 17, was tricked into sending intimate photographs of himself, then faced a demand for £3,000 to avoid exposure.

He killed himself even though he had revealed the threat to his parents and police in County Tyrone, Northern Ireland.

Daniel Perry, from Dunfermline, also 17, took his own life after threats to reveal his compromising online conversations.

Organised crime groups in the Philippines, Morocco and Ivory Coast were discovered running many of the sextortion scams, some using British girls.

Most of the UK victims are men aged 18-24, the eldest was 82 and the youngest 14. Some women have also been targeted.
Police have issued advice to victims, urging them not to pay or panic, but to shut down their social media accounts and report what has happened. Senior officers insisted they will investigate and will not judge victims’ behaviour. The fear at the moment is that people are not reporting these crimes because of the fear of embarrassment but it is important you act. The internet is what it is. It can be a great place to network with other people from all around the world. It is a great place to share experiences and be all the best things humans can be. But there are also some very devious people out there. So make sure you act safe and think about what you share. Maybe I’m old fashioned but perhaps it would be better to save the nakedness for people you know and meet in person. 

You fakers!!!!

Interesting little story from the Daily Mirror today. It’s about women who are vocal in bed and what it REALLY means. 

A recent study looked into how vocal women are during sex at Indiana University and what it means. 

“There isn’t a lot of research in this area,” said Kristen Mark, a sexuality researcher at Indiana University told CNN , “but we’re bombarded with images through mainstream media that tell us moaning is associated with orgasm and sexual pleasure.”

“So it would be a fairly wise faking strategy to moan since men already tend to associate moaning with orgasm.”

So what are we saying here? Are we saying that every loud orgasm is faked? Or is it possible for a loud vocalisation to actually represent pleasure?

In 2011, Gayle Brewer of the University of Central Lancashire and Colin Hendrie of the University of Leeds published their research on the topic in Archives of Sexual Behavior

In the study, 71 sexually active heterosexual women aged between 18 and 48 were asked questions about making noise during sex. Many of the women had admitted to being vocal during sex but also admitted that is wasn’t an indication of pleasure. 
In fact, 66% of the women said that their loud vocalisations (known better as copulatory vocalisations) were to spur on their partner to climax and bring things to an end.  Interestingly, 87% future explained their motivation was to boost their partner’s self-esteem.

If this news wasn’t concerning enough for men, the study highlighted that the odds having a loud orgasm because of penetrative sex decrease.

In fact, the study came to the conclusion that “While female orgasms were most commonly experienced during foreplay, copulatory vocalisations were reported to be made most often before and simultaneously with male ejaculation.”  Furthermore, the participants of the study ADMITTED that they actually made noise to “RELIEVE BOREDOM” in addition to just being fatigued and/or experiencing pain or  discomfort. 

So I have to say to these lady participants, all those who said that you faked it to boost your partners’ confidence, let’s just hope they didn’t read this. 

It also makes we wonder about a girl I knew from University. She often used to come out of her room in the morning and apologise to us in case she was too loud. But if she was faking it, why didn’t she tone it down slightly? I mean, think of us who are trying to sleep damn it! NOT COOL! I guess it is also a sign that GENTLEMAN, MAKE SURE YOU GET INVOLVED IN FOREPLAY! Women have needs too and if you don’t help them out, then they may even stop faking it!!

You have been warned!

Why are men attracted to a lady’s legs?


In Psychology Today, Dr Leon Seltzer hypothesises what it is about a woman’s legs that is so appealing to men. 

The article, published in May 2016, looks at various theories why a woman’s legs are so desirable.  It seems that there is no straightforward answer either. One man on a Quora question said that he associated the amount of leg on display as an indication of “sexual availability” while others associated their legs as a pivotal lead to other parts of a woman’s anatomy.  Either way, there are a number of theories surrounding this attraction and it is an interesting read. Check it out @ This Address

Men and Penis Envy

I recently saw this interesting article in a publication called Psychology Tomorrow which publishes interesting articles on a variety of topics. 

Today, I saw an article which tackled th subject of Penis Envy and how size effects a man’s self esteem. The article itself is somewhat of an extension of an article in Psychology Today that was retracted in 2012 on penis envy. 

It stated:

“The center of a man’s existence is his penis. At the root of his self-worth is how he feels about the size of his penis and what he thinks about its ability to please his partners.”

The statement is actually quite an interesting one. Indeed, a man’s relationship with his penis is a complicated one. There is the idea that a man with a “big dick” has a sense of entitlement. It brings into play this idea of a man having “big balls” and having the ability to power through anything purely because of his manhood. Then, you have this idea of the guy with the small dick being this irritating little twerp who goes through life bullying his co-workers and who acts like somewhat of a know-it-all. Even in the current Presidential Elections, you’ll see people say that Donald Trump has a small penis and that makes him less of a man. I don’t like Donald Trump at all but that sort of comment is below the belt (haha, sorry!)

There isn’t a man who hasn’t compared the size of his penis to other men in the locker room or at the urinal, a sizing-up that leads to either a prideful smile or a sense of inadequacy. And men will worry about how they will measure up with their partner’s former lovers. Will she be satisfied, happy, or disappointed by your appearance. It’s rather nerve wracking. 

Of course, if a guy deals with all these size issues and actually starts having sex without a panic attack, there’s always the matter of sexual performance nagging at him. Will he be able to sustain his erection? Let’s face it. There isn’t a man whose uncooperatively limp penis hasn’t embarrassed him at some time during sex. And if that isn’t the concern, then there’s the mortal fear of premature ejaculation or taking too long to come and boring your partner. Yep, this is all so much fun and anxiety provoking. 

For a man, their penis size gives a man their sense of virility. And beyond a man’s athleticism and job prestige/earning power, his penis size is a symbol of one’ masculinity. Of course this isn’t helped by TV shows like Hung and Sex in the City where attractive women speak of their preference for a large Johnson. I mean, I had such a thing for Charlotte back in the day!

The truth behind what women want is less clear. Indeed, many women will say that size doesn’t matter but it’s how you use it while others will clearly show a preference for it. I think that the “modern” girl though isn’t afraid to make it known that she wants someone who is as equally good looking as they are interesting and they days are gone when a nice guy can meet a good woman without putting any effort into his looks. I mean, let’s face it. We live in a superficial society and many men have gone completely superficial for years. So why not? Women can do the same. It’s just unfortunate for guys like me who are not good looking that we are no longer able to win a girl over with charm! I mean, I’m pretty screwed in that regard. 

Either way, men are becoming more and more anxious about the way they look and their pulling power. And while you can, with money, pretty much correct most things physically, the size of your penis cannot be changed easily, at least not without severe risk to fertility. 

But what are the facts?

Researchers at Kings College London analyzed data from more than 20 studies with more than 15,000 men, who underwent penis size measurements by health professionals using a standardized procedure. The average man’s lengths were 3.61 inches flaccid, 5.17 inches erect; the average circumferences were 3.67 inches flaccid and 4.59 inches erect. So, in truth, unless you have watched too much poor and think that every man is endowed like Dirk Diggler, you probably are in the norm anyway. 

Conclusions:

Penis envy is another example of anxiety in an ever increasing superficial world. You are judged on whether you are fat, thin, old, young, endowed, or not endowed. People have unrealistic expectations of what they should be or should not. It’s a sad reality that girls and guys don’t want average people anymore. They only want guys and girls that fit the media darlings and anyone else is less than perfect. I know that it has made me question the likelihood of ever being in a meaningful relationship.  And if I never am, I won’t be surprised.