Arrogance (Poem)

I’m just so sexy 

You know it’s true. 

I may be fat 

And hairy too

But I don’t care

That’s who I am 

I’m not a fraud 

But what a man. 

I’ve got the brains 

A boffin prince

I am unique

The last in print. 

Just call me Barry,

Like Manilow 

Now be my Mandy 

Third base we’ll go

So now I’ll end 

This glorious piece

I know your love

Will never cease. 

 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

And Bahahahahahaha. 

Inspired by the theme song of Tyler Breeze. 

Movie Review: Shark in Venice

STARRING: Stephen Baldwin, Vanessa Johansson and Giacomo Gonella

Hey guys and thanks for reading. Today’s review is on the 2008 horror movie Shark in Venice.


 The movie was pitched as being like Indiana Jones meets Jaws so obviously I was intrigued to see what this movie had to offer, especially since I am a big fan of creature features, Jaws and generally anything that has sharks in. 

Without spoiling the story, the plot goes something along the lines of: Stephen Baldwin is David Franks, an archeologist who heads off to Venice to search for his father who mysteriously went missing in Venice, while diving in the city. When he arrives, David uncovers a cryptic trail that may unveil the lost fortunes of the Medici. The mafia are aware of this lost fortune and are keeping an eye on Franks’s every move as he attempts to hunt this treasure and by the way, they’re not the only ones that could stand in his way. Because you see…there are sharks. 


Even though this film reeks (of promise), surprisingly it doesn’t quite deliver. This is even with Stephen Baldwin’s best acting efforts (see above). 

Seriously though, the film is an absolute mess. I don’t know how my Dad even found this movie but he did and since we had it, we had to watch it. I actually started laughing at this movie within the first thirty seconds of hitting play. This was mainly do the ridiculous looking mafia boss played by Giacomo Gonella (see below). 


The storyline was laughable, although maybe not on par with Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus, while the acting and script were disastrous. Stephen Baldwin is a bad actor. He’s so bad. If you must see one scene in this movie, it’s the scene where he is having a nightmare. He also looks like he is in a constant state of jet lag. That being said, I don’t want to give him too much credit as the rest of the cast were equally awful. 

Movies like this need a sense of humour. For example, while Sharktopus was an incredibly bad movie, it’s one saving grace was that you could tell that nobody was taking themselves seriously. You unfortunately can’t say the same for this. This film was just bad and it was not intentionally bad. That’s what makes it so much more tragic. It also makes you wonder how Stephen Baldwin ever managed to get roles like the Usual Suspects. 

Verdict: if you are a glutton for punishment or you really want to punish someone with a movie, then this movie is for you. It’s also a good guide on how not to make a good movie. If you are one of these people, who like me, loves to see silly movies and laugh and/or have a bit of a giggle, you may also get some value out of this but I would recommend you have some alcohol on standby.  Otherwise, stay clear!

Grade: E

Jonah Hill mocked on French TV


Jonah Hill recently appeared on French television program Le Grand Journal with the intention of promoting his latest movie War Dogs but things didn’t go quite according to plan…

Hill was being interviewed by the show’s host, French beauty Ornella Fleury when things began to take a turn for the worse. Fleury joked “It’s when I saw you get sodomized by a three-meter-tall demon in This Is the End that I told myself, ‘Now that’s the man of my dreams!'” And Hill didn’t find it one bit funny. Indeed, amidst the laughter, you can hear Hill retort “”I hear you get sodomized pretty often!”

Things only got worse from there as Fleury, undeterred by Hill’s response, proceeded to share with the audience her sexual fantasy involving Hill. Awesome right? Not for Hill. Fleury elaborated “My sexual fantasy would be that we’d meet up in a hotel room at night. We would chat, you’d make me laugh. You would make me laugh a lot! And then all of a sudden, you’d bring your friends DiCaprio and Brad Pitt — And then you’d go away!” Jonah Hill, visibly annoyed at this stage simply responded  “I’m glad I came to this show to get ridiculed by a local weather girl. It’s nice”. 

It has since been reported that Jonah Hill consequently cancelled all further interviews scheduled to promote his movie. Yikes!

For the FULL video of the exchange, watch the video below…